Happy Week Day - 19 weeks

Well Happy week day to you all! These past few weeks have been a blurry mess, I hope I can remember everything new in my life. I am now the size of an heirloom tomatoe! 6 inches long. My arms and legs have grown so much. And now I have people talking to me.

The other day, I was just starting to drift off asleep, when all of a sudden someone screamed in my ear: Whaz up!? I think it was daddy. But boy did that freak me out. I started squirming trying to move away. Then, finally, I wound down and everything was good again. 

Just recently, I was minding my own business, when I stretched my arms up, and there on the top of my head, I felt something furry, it was my hair! That's right, I am growing hair!!! Also, I started to realize that my skin started to get a little rubbery. I think I was pickling. I looked up the reason online, and all the other babies in the womb recommended that I use this waxy coating called vernix caseosa. So now I am not pickling, but am more like a waxy version of my former self. I hear there is even as gag gift of wax lips. Should be interesting when I get out of here.

Lately I have spent my afternoons observing my siblings. I see my brother doing many convulsions, like he normally does, and I try to repeat them. It's fun, but occassionally mama will grab me and say something, the which I don't totally understand, but I think she wants me to stop. So I stop. Well, it is time to go and do my daily cartwheels.

-beta

Happy Week Day! - 17 weeks

Yep! I am 17 weeks along and the size of a turnip. You know, it has been a long week. Mama and daddy pulled a fast one on me, and while I was in the bathroom, along came that Dr. and collapsed the left wing of my house. Luckily, I wasn't in there mainly because I couldn't fit through the door any more, it was the zygote part of the house.

So, yesterday I discovered the most fun thing ever: rolling summersaults. I learned how to do them while watching Star Wars: the phantom menace. Those robots that roll? Yeah, doing that is so much fun, you can do it over and over again. I did that for a good 30 mins yesterday. Mama has given me the  nickname ninja caterpillar. She says I feel like a ninja caterpillar in her stomach when I do that. Anyways, now I am going to go get ready for church!

- beta

Happy Week Day!

So, first off, I have to apologize. I lost my internet access about 2 weeks ago. I didn't realize that my posts were being posted until 1 week in. Then I resorted to snail mail, only to find out, I can't send letters without what they call "Stamps". But, no worries, I am back!

Today, I am 16 weeks! 4 months! Can you believe it? I am the size of an Avocado. Not the small ones, but the Hass Avocado. Did you know, my legs are HUGE! Yeah, I have really been working on them at the Gym, so they are progressing nicely. However, I am thinking it is time to start working on the rest of my body. I am thinking it is time for a growth spurt!

The family, this past week, decided to go for a vacation. You know, I really like vacations, however, there was one part I didn't really like.

There I was, just sleeping away when a rumbling began. It started slow and grew gradually more and more. There I was just trying to sleep when all of the a sudden, the entire house started to shake and undulate sporadically! (Like those words, I borrowed daddy's thesaurus!) I was getting tossed and turned, shaken, not stirred, until finally it ended after about 20 minutes. I used the UMBCam to figure out what was happening, there my family was singing at the top of their lungs while driving over a bumpy road!

Now I am home, and I think I am just going to take it easy for a day or two. This should be nice and relaxing.

- Beta

P.S. - I have toe nails too! They are so cute!

Happy Week Day!

Happy Week Day! When life gives you a lemon...It's probably just me! That's right. I am a lemon, I mean the size of a lemon.

So I just started noticing, recently, like with in the last few days, when I hear or feel certain things, I started to realize that there was something wrong with my face. I started to realize, when I was happy, that the corners of my mouth started turning upward. When I heard something I didn't like, they started to move downward in what I think is a frown. The part of my face, just above the eyes, would move inward as well. And when I was frustrated...then the whole face was just completely moving like crazy!

Also, something really exciting just happened as well: I know what my thumb is for! Did you know you can use it to grab things? Yeah, I grabbed this cord out in front of me. It kept smacking me in the face, so I grabbed. I don't know what happened next, I must have fallen asleep because I woke up a few moments later. I think it was bad that I did that, but like I said, I don't remember having done anything else.

Anyways, got lots to do, places to go, people to see, and faces to make at others.

- Beta

Happy Week Day!

13 Weeks!  That's right. I am the size of a pea pod, about 3 inches long. It is crazy! This past week has just flown by. I have been working on my detective skills lately. I have been honing my abilities to pick locks and such. Did you know that honing your lock picking skills is counter intuitive when there isn't a lock to pick!  But I did an online course and got my certificate www.onlinelocksmithcourse.com. It's kind of cool.

But you know, while I was studying how to be a detective, I stumbled across fingerprints! I found out about them about 3 weeks ago. That's also when I ordered by junior detective kit. When I dusted for fingerprints, I didn't find any. I guess I didn't have any.  But yesterday, when I was cleaning things up, some of the fingerprint dust had fallen out on the table. When I started to pick it up, I realized something: I HAVE FINGERPRINTS!  They are so cool. Did you know you can make a fingerprint on just about everything? Yeah, and they are also used to identify people. I don't know why it happened, but, this morning I got a knock on the door. It was a government official asking for my fingerprint data. He also asked for my bank number and social security number. I asked Daddy what to do and he told me to lock the door and don't give him anything. Daddy said the person was a fraud and that they were trying to steal my identity.  It was a good thing I listened because as the person turned away, he was wearing a costume and I could tell it was a Rogue Mitochondria. He was trying to steal my DNA. But this Fetus wasn't having any of that. I had my MRNA run a message out to his DNA tell them to RuNAway! ;)

Well... off to spinning class. I might need some extra food today, as I will be working on my little biceps and legs today!

-beta

Can't Stop This Feeling Anymore

To borrow a line from the 80's: Can't stop this feeling anymore! I woke up this morning, and all of a suddent I can't stop my mouth from making this bizarre shape. My lips are all puckered as if I want to latch onto something. It's really weird. I don't know exactly what to think, but I hope I get it figured out soon. Also, you know how I said I was the size of a fig, well I am not, I am really the size of a lime.

You know it's weird, I am also thinking I am smelling now. Probably not really, but for some reasons my toes are curling. Can anyone else curl their toes? Maybe we should have a toe curling contest. How often can you curl your toes in one hour. I am going on 22 times, let's see how long you can go. Anyways, time to head of for a quick jog around the mama course. I've noticed I have been getting fast and faster at running, but I think it's because I am bigger, not necessarily faster.

-beta

*Sniff*, I didn't get to go!

Today, it is with heavy heart that I am writing to you from my home. I was set to go on a cruise, but it turns out, I couldn't go. When the bus showed up, they wouldn't let me on. Something about being to big to fit on the bus. I am devastated. Do you know how much work went into preparing for this cruise?! I mean just the number of suitcases required would have filled that bus. I even stocked up on lemon meringue pie and other favorites of mine, but, nevertheless, I couldn't go. Sad. Sad Beta!

I guess I will just have to enjoy the sunny days with Mama and my siblings. I like the sun. I love how it feels on Mama's tummy. I like the feel of just floating and enjoying the breeze. Ok, maybe not the breeze, since I can't let it in. I tried once. I followed the UMBCam all the way to its source, but I couldn't open the port hole. You would think that they should have an emergency escape hatch or something like that, but I guess Mama doesn't want me getting out when I shouldn't. I don't blame her. I'm cute! So without further ado, I present, for your viewing pleasure, a selfie!

As you can see, I have a very cute and pointed nose. My chiseled jaw comes from my Father. Can you see my finger nails? I have worked on those for weeks. My round little back side. Finally, I didn't want to take a picture until my Eyes moved to the front of head. You see I now look like a normal person!  I am sooooo ready for my close up! Do you think I should have this laminated? Maybe a 8x11 Glossy.  Anyways, I sent a copy along with a resume to my agent, hopefully they will find something for me when I get out of here.

-Beta

Happy Week Day!

Today I am 12 weeks! Crazy!  I am the size of a fig. Over the last little bit, I am sure you have noticed that I haven't written in a while. That is principally because I have been preparing to go on a cruise! Yeah...I was invited by some red blood cell friends, to come on a cruise around the circulatory system. I am so excited. They invited me a couple of weeks ago, but I didn't have the opportunity to get around to it until today!  So today, I will be leaving to go on a two week cruise. I don't know if I will have internet, but if I do, I will try to write.

Can you believe that it has been 12 weeks already? Yeah, kind of crazy! So I got back recently from a trip to the Gorge, I really like to hike. Anyways, I got back and I noticed something with my wall recently: it was taller and kind of making my whole house lean.  I didn't know why, so I started to dig and try and figure out what was happening.  There I was, knee deep in stuff, when I saw that there was a button that was sticking up. Evidently, the "nausea" button that I had built over the top of, was now stick straight up. I trying pushing it back down, but I couldn't get it to stay down. I still can't get it to stay down. I contacted the contractor who initially remodeled this place, and he said there was nothing he could do. Mama was not going to feel sick. Something about some new drug. So, here I am writing to you from the latest attraction: The leaning tower of Beta. Oh well, I will just have to find some picture frames that lean.

- Beta

Happy Week Day!

11 Weeks! Can you believe it? Yeah, it has been a long quiet week. Daddy hasn't been so diligent with writing my letters. He even made up the excuse of injuring his back! Can you believe that?

Well, I am officially the size of a Fig. Yep. A Fig. I am growing like crazy and I am starting to notice some big changes. Did you know, that after you start growing, that you start to grow these things called bones?  Yeah...I know. Weird!  There I was just moving and doing my thing, when all of a sudden, one of my arms swung around and hit me the head. Now, it has done this before, but this time, IT HURT! Yeah, it was hard. It kept doing it over and over again, that I decided to tie it down next to my body. So, here I am, a fetus with one arm tied down and the other flailing around.

Now for something serious. Yesterday, while I was just sitting here, floating and contemplating my Mama's heartbeat, my insides blew up! Yep. And not just once but multiple times. Over and over again. I would sit there and BOOM! My tummy would convulse and a bubble would travel up and out of my mouth at and incredible speed!  It was awful! So, there I was looking it up online and I think it was a Hiccup!  I am glad I am still way to small that mama can't feel it. I think it would make her concerned. But don't worry, evidently, babies blow up often!

- Beta

To Morn or not to Morn

To Morn or not to Morn, that is the battle. Whether tis nobler to say unto your mother: tis morn, awake and arise. Or to say to your brother: tis not yet 7 am, go back to sleep. This constant epic battle plays out each morning, and quite frankly, I haven't yet decided which I will be. However, I will say this, lately, my brother has turned into quite the fun haver in the mornings. He awakes and runs around the house like a mad child. Oh how I wish I could run.

My little legs are developing quite nicely and they are continuously moving. I need to talk to mama a little bit, because I have noticed that the bigger I get, the smaller the house gets. I tried looking into moving the walls out more, but I was unable to. Do you think I could get mama to extend her tummy? I have really started to grow quite a bit. Anyways, time for sleep, well more of it anyways.

-beta

Happy week day!

Ladies and gentlemen! In this corner, weighing less than 1 ounce and standing just over 1 1/4 înch, your latest Fetus: Beta!!! (I will wait for the applause to die down). Yep, I did it! I passed my test and I am now a full fledged fetus. Looking back at these past 10 weeks, it has been a long haul, but so worth it. I have grown and am now the size of a Kumquat! Daddy likes that word. He told me that as he would write, kumquat, my letter down, kumquat, that he would use the word kumquat as much, kumquat, as, kumquat, he, kumquat, could. Daddy, that is enough! Kumquat! Ahhhhhhh!

Dadi has bin temp o rarely re plaiced. He kept saying come squat. C u tomorrow!

-beta

Ps. Here is a kumquat

Party time!

So it has been a hard week for mama and I. I have been studying like crazy to get ready for next week.  Today is my test for becoming a fetus. Wish me luck! I am sorry that I have been so heads down, and stealing so much energy from mama, just because I need to stay up longer than normal. All week long I have been getting to bed around 2 in the morning, so last night, I decided I wanted to throw a party! I invited all sorts of friends. I had a couple of RNA/TRNA friends over. They didn't get along very well with the MRNA because, well let's be honest, we always tend to beat the messenger up. Anyways the party was fun, but we stayed up until 3. Oops! Sorry mommy. I will start to do better.

Anyways, the party was fun and now I am going to sleep. I hope I get a good grade. I will let you all know what happens tomorrow.

-beta

The basics of a heartbeat

I have been thinking off and on over the past few days, about the basics of heartbeats! You know, I hear mama's heartbeat, and then I hear my own. Mine is very different. Kind of weird. Hers is SO powerful. Daddy says it is because she likes to run. I hear her heartbeat and it makes me very sleepy. At times, I will even drift .... Wait, what was I saying? Oh yeah. So I hear hers, and then I compare it to mine. Mine is a lot faster and it also sounds different. I only have 2 chambers in my heart, and mama has 4. 

Recently, however, as I have been listening, my heartbeat is changing. Instead of a tinny sound, kind of shallow, it is becoming more robust like mama's. It is a really weird feeling. Once it beats half way it kind of flaps for a brief millisecond. I wondered why I felt it doing that a couple of days ago. Then, as I was researching it, I found the answer in a song: "the Answer my friend, is blowing in the wind. The answer is blowing in the wind". It made total sense. When I breathe in, wind makes the flap move. I hope it closes soon!

-beta

The double gambit of gas

So I have decided that I really don't like soft drinks or soda as some might call it. Did you know that whenever mama drinks soda, it tickles my nose? Yeah, there I was minding my own business, when all of a sudden, a funny sensation took over on the front of my face. This tingling sensation that makes new want to just rip my nose off my face. But here is the real torture: my arms aren't long enough to scratch my nose! Oh the horror and the nastiness that is Coca-Cola! In order to combat the sensation, I do the only thing that I can: I pull the nausea cord! But you know what happens then? Yeah, mama drinks for soda to combat the nausea. It is a wicked web we interweave!

Yesterday was a good day. Mama and I got to visit some kids and they had all sorts of fun toys. I recently found a camera still attached to mama's belly button. It was labeled UMBCam. I attached to it, and now I can see everything clearly. Did you know Daddy walks funny? Yeah, he walks like a mitochondria with an enlarged cristae. Yeah, he's funny looking.

-beta

Happy week day!

I am 9 weeks old and this size of grape! I am sitting here, while writing this, checking all my organs. Brain, heart, lungs, intestines, colon, appendix, liver, kidneys, arms, legs, feet toes, hands and fingers. I am all here! Eyes are here too. But you know what? I still can't open them! They are fused shut. I consulted my manual: Babies, every thing from 0 - 21 years,  and it says that is normal. Did you know I come with a manual? Yeah. All babies do, but I was looking around and found my brothers. He left it behind. I wonder if that is normal?

So yesterday, I went on a safari! It was so much fun. I went all over mama's body, and I got some real trophies. I have a white and red blood cell on my wall now. I found some mitochondria, they were real stinkers, they fought the hards. The best trophy though, is hands down the ribosome I caught! I left it alive because I can have it produce any protein I want whenever I want!  Woohoo! An endless supply of  food. This should be good. Anyways, time to cleanup and get ready for church! I like nursery, if only I could see the toys.

-beta

Not Torn Docks, Doc-tor

Wow! So now it is official, the entire family knows. Mama and Daddy took me to the Torn Docks, but it turns out, that I just mis-understood, I went to the doctor. 

So there, I was with all my scrap booking materials spread out all over the floor, and I haven't vacuum since I moved in (mainly because Amazon said they didn't have a miniaturiser for shrinking things to fit inside humans, grrr I thought customer support was supposed to help) and boy did they surprise me. There I was trying to paste a picture of my sister's head on a page when bam! This massive thing bumped me right on the noggin. At first I thought it was nothing, but it wasn't. It kept moving around. I ran from it, but finally it pinned me in the corner. I made all sorts of silly faces at it, but all of a sudden a beam shot out and scanned me from head to toe. There was even a smaller beam that put a criss cross on my head and extended to my toes. I think they were measuring me.

Finally, they left me alone. Once I saw they were done, I immediately got things cleaned up. That was so embarassing.

Well, then, last night, mama and daddy told my siblings about me. It took them a while to figure out what mama was telling them, but finally, they got the hint and all is well. The world knows! Now I need to figure out how to send them direct messages. The Internet in here is spotty at best, I try to get mama to turn over more often when I am on it, but she does the opposite. Oh well! I think I am going to go on a safari today. I will tell you about it tomorrow.

-beta

Chasm Floating and Torn Docks!

Have you ever just floated in the chasm, and just listened to the marvelous heart beat of your mother? I have. It's one of my most favorite things to do. The sweet 100 decibel beat of the "mama heart" is so soothing! Whenever I here it speeding up, it helps me sleep. Floating. Just floating and feeling completely free is such a marvelous feeling!

This morning I woke up a little nervous. Mama and daddy are going to take me to a Torn Dock or something tomorrow. They say they want to hear my heartbeat. I looked it up on line, and I just don't understand how they are going to use a Torn Dock to hear my heartbeat. The only way I can think to do it, is make me scared some how to make my heartbeat loud enough to be heard on the outside. I have determined that nothing good comes from a dock! Anyways, that is why I am just floating here all day, so I can relax.

What will tomorrow bring?

- beta

Mashed potatoes!

So I know I go on and on about food all the time, but seriously, I really like mashed potatoes! They are like pre-chewed french fries, but without all the grease. I am thinking this will definitely be a craving I can keep for a long time.

So recently I have noticed that I am taking quite the toll on mama, and she is just so tired. I know she hasn't been able to get out as much as she used to, so I am making a deal. Mama, if you are reading this, I will let you have 15-20 minutes a day to get out and exercise a little. Once you do that, though, you have to promise me you will get me some mashed potatoes. No seriously. Good ones with plenty of milk and butter. I like butter too.

-beta

Happy Week Day!

I did it! I am the size of a kidney bean! And, I also finally fit into my jeans. The tail is almost gone. Do you know how many ab crunches you have to do to get rid of a tail? Yeah, a lot. I am constantly moving and trying to get rid of this tail. I also am starting to feel something in my throat growing towards the middle of my chest. For the past little bit, I have felt two distinct things growing in my chest, I looked it up on the wifi and they are my lungs. 

So yesterday, I had a run in with my brother. Here I was just minding my own business when, wham! He smacked mama's belly and I got the worst of it. He is so gonna get thrown up on when I get out of here. The rivalry begins! What will the Beta do? Only the Mama knows! Da-da-dum!

-beta

First there were 2, now there are 10

I am so excited! So when I first noticed my fingers, there were only 2. One on each hand.  I woke up this morning and realized there 10! Five on each hand! We humans are so weird. Do you think if I wait long enough, there will be 10 more. I mean like, that would be so....wait....I just saw something while writing this, ten more fingers! They on my feet! I have 20, ok, not really, they are toes, but still I can definitely come up with adventures for those too!  Time to get sucking!

-beta

Looking Forward

So yesterday, I wanted to wake up and look forward. I wanted to think of who I wanted to become. I wanted to will myself to grow. I figured, I could do with a little pick me up, so I hired a motivational speaker to come and talk to me. They were great! After they left, I started looking around me. I have really let this place become a mess, so I cleaned up the house. I started to excercise a little more. Also' after listening to the speaker, I realized I needed a change in my routine. I changed everything! I even told mama that I didn't want the normal food! Nothing sounded good to me, so I just kept telling her not to eat what she was eating.

The crazy part of my motivation came when the speaker introduced me to a mirror! I really started to look at myself and realized that I was quite transparent! People could see right through me, so I decided to try some clothes on. Not so well. Did you know that when you still have a tail bone protruding out, that your pants don't fit? Oh well, what grew down, must grow up! As my  motivational speaker says: if you can't touch your toes, grow some!

-beta

Time warp!

Once upon a time, there was a little embryo growing inside of a mama. Now this embryo loved to drink milk, drink v8 splash, and suck as much energy as possible from mama. One day, this embryo went to sleep and didn't wake up until 2 days later. Why? Do you ask? Because they fell into a TIME WARP! It was soooo cool. I just got back from an excursion that was so unique and marvelous, I just had to tell you about it. I am still shaking from the excitement. I was sleeping away, when all of a sudden, a huge hole opened up. It sucked me inside. There I was falling for a really long time, swirling and swinging around and watching my siblings swirl around me. Did you know how much fun it is to put your arms in the air as you fall down! It is so cool! The amnio fluid swirling around you. The colon passing you by as you looking into the deep red pockets of the small intestine! Oh the sweet whisperings of mama's heart! It was so cool.

As I fell, I got closer and closer to something blue and brighter than anything I had ever seen. Turns out, it was mama's sock! I got closer to it, then slowed down and started to go in reverse. Slowing when, after a while, I finally got back home. I woke up and, now after relating this story to you, I start to realize what happened: I fell out of bed while sleeping and got stuck in my brother's bungee cord! I definitely need to talk to him when I get out of here.

-beta

V8 Splash! Branching out

So today, I thought I would give mama a break and let her get some energy back. I also decided that I wouldn't drink so much milk and branch out trying some different drinks. V8 splash was first up. The jury is still out on that, don't quite know what to make of it. Right now, I am swimming in orange pineapple juice and singing if I only had some toes!  

-beta

Happy Week Day!

I a a blueberry! Ok, technically I am not a blueberry, but I am just as big as one and just as sweet! (I will wait for you women to finish cooing over that last statement). I have been growing like crazy this last week. Did you know that I have partial eyelids, a nose, skin, 2 hemispheres of my brain, a liver, a pancreas, an appendix and a loop in my intestine? Yeah, and you wonder why mama has been tired. I had a nice calm day yesterday, I wanted to take some time and reflect on where I have been over the last little bit. I am so happy that I get meet so many people and just have some fun. I have quite a bit planned for next week, I hope I get around to it.

-beta

French Fries and mixed signals

So last night, I hit the emergency "I need food" button and placed an order for some ice cream. Just as soon as I placed the order, I realized I had pressed the wrong button and something called "French fries" was ordered. I wasn't quite sure what to expect, but once mama started eating I was very happy! Did you know about these fries? They are awesome! I wanted more and more.

Later during the night, I kept asking for more and more of them, but mama didn't feel too well after that. Something about her gall bladder. So, she was sick through the night and I was cranky during the night. Now that it is morning and I have had something good to eat, I realize, it was only the French fries talking and not me. I need to make sure I use that button sparingly. They were good though.

-beta

Siblings and the paper birds!

Over the past couple of days, I have decided I wanted to watch my siblings playing and try to figure out what games they are playing, so that I can be studied up to play with them when I get out of here. As I have been watching, my sister made these intricate birds out of paper! They are really cool. The birds flap their wings when you move them up and down. When my siblings play with the birds, they run around the house squawking and making all sorts of noise. It looks like so much fun.

I had to try it. So I decided to run around and move my arms up and down flapping them like crazy, because you know I can do that now. Anyways, as I did that, I think I may have effected mama, I slammed into the sickness button multiple times. Sorry mama! Anyways, I will continue to watch my siblings and see if they have any more fun games to play. My brother however, has a crazy game of twitching, convulsions and sounds that I haven't quite figured out yet. He swings one arm around and says "Ha! Take that!" Maybe it won't make sense until after I try it out?

-beta

Sleep master beta "B"

That's right, just call me sleep master beta "B"! Ever since I saw the potential in my arms, I figured I needed to step up my training! I called my brother's trainer to see if he would be willing to train me, but he was called away to fight some battle with an Aasgardian or something, who kows what that is. Anyways, he told me about some people and I am happy to say, I have found my new trainer. He is a new person on the block, but boy does he know his stuff. My biceps are the size of a blastocyst. Very exciting. With all this training, I need a lot of energy, so I re-ran the electric that I had just done and found another power cell, previously untapped. It was marked "momma's backup energy". Good thing I can't read because this new energy is helping me grow like crazy. I hope to reach blueberry size by Sunday! 

I have noticed, however, that momma seems to not move as often as she did before I started training. I hope she is doing well. I made sure to tape down her sleep button, so that when I train, I don't accidentally kick it. Well, off to train!

-beta

They're alive!

So, yesterday I was just sitting around after a lively growing session, and while drinking some milk, i looked to my right and saw something moving. I kind of jumped from the start of seeing something moving and low and behold, there were my fingers moving! My hand as well! They're alive! So I naturally turned to my Left to see if the others were moving, and you know what, they were not. I was so frustrated. I sat there and just thought how frustrating it was.

After thinking about it for a while, I was really. angry, and so I turned and looked right at them. I couldn't say much to my fingers and hand, as my mouth is not entirely open, but I could think it. I thought up quite the toungue lashing for my fingers. I pictured my right arm moving and said, see, that arm and fingers know what to do, why not you? Do you want me to show you? All of a sudden, the fingers responded and said: don't let your left hand know what your right hand doeth. And with that, I think it was enough to make them angry enought that they moved! My fingers and arm moved! I can move both arms and fingers and hands. Now was it an accident or was it on purpose? Nope, for the next several hours they kept hitting me in the chin, as they are not quite long enough to hit me in the face.

My arms are now asleep, thank goodness, and I can go on growing. Oh the fun that we are going to have, me and my arms.

-beta

Open letter to Daddy

Dear Daddy,

  Over the last two days, you haven't been around that much. You haven't helped me with my correspondence and have such, failed in your duty! I will demand milk in several installments to make it up to me, or just come and give me a shout out when you have a chance! I like it when you tickle mommy, it makes her belly jiggle and then I jiggle as well. I get to have a fun ride for a few seconds. I give you permission to tickle her as often as you like, but beware, I found a warning here from my brother talking about the last time you tickled her, she got angry. So maybe if you tickle her when she is  least expecting it? Just remind her, this all part of your apologizing to me for not helping me as you should have.

-beta

The Sleeper

So I have to apologize to momma for the last few days and also for what will come over the next little bit. I was talking with my contractor, and I found out that, by accident, when pushing the walls out for the jacuzzi and dance hall, that the walls have been pushed up against the sleep cord, labeled so by my brother. It turns out that I can't fix it because the wall is a load baring wall. So, sorry momma! I didn't mean to make you sleepy all the time.

On a side note, we went to visit some family yesterday. I have determined that I don't like large groups. It makes momma not feel well, and in turn, there are so many people, I just couldn't remember all their names! There was Sleepy, Bashful, Doc...wait, see, I can only remember so many names, there isn't enough space in my brain yet...which is starting to develop quite nicely! Well gotta get momma up for my first morning breakfast, I have three normally.

-beta

Happy weekday!

It's official, I am now 6 weeks old! Woohoo! I am the size of a lentil. Now I have been experiencing some rather strange feelings over the past couple of days. First, when I look to either side of my torso, there are these things, bumps sticking out with little stems and bumps sticking out from them as well. I can't explain why, but I have the uncanny urge to suck on one of them. Next, I am starting to feel something grow inside my mouth, I am starting to get the urge to sing! Don't know why. Finally, while I was looking in the mirror, I found these impressions on the side of my perfectly shaped oval head! Why did this happen? This was my best feature? They are on either side of my head. Oh well, I guess this lentil is starting to turn into a split pea.

Well, I am happy to report that all is well, and now if I can only get mama to wake up and get me some milk. I am hungry! All of the time!

-beta

Eee-Kea or Eye-Kea... How do I order this goodness?

Today, we went to a store that was called Eye-kea or Eeee-Kea. Mama called it the first, Daddy called it the latter, but you know what? That doesn't matter, I think I know what to decorate with. Such a cool Store. Did you know that they have a solar lamp? Yeah, I ordered one. When it gets here I am going to install it on mama's belly button. Should bring some needed light into the house. 

I'm turning six weeks tomorrow. I am so excited. My dermatologist says my endoderm is coming along quite nicely, I should start to develop quite quickly here soon. Anyways, I need to get to bed now, see you in a few hours!

-beta

Hidden Secret

When you have a secret to tell someone, you sometimes get a little excited and it is all you can do to simply not tell someone. When you are the secret however, you pretty much get to watch people and have fun with them. Yesterday, my new sister was told that she was being adopted. I am SO excited to let her and my brother know that I am in here, so much so, I got WAY too excited and had to crash! I think I want to liken myself to s shark! Or maybe "a piranha" as the girl in finding nemo my say.

I can see it now, swimming around inside of mama, and then, as one of my siblings places their heads on her stomach: pow! It attack. I have been studying up on them, and I will perfect many moves. I will lay in wait until the perfect moment, until I have seen all that I can, without any eyes, which I hope to grow in a few months. Did I mention, my mesoderm is overtaking my ectoderm? Yeah sounds like a personal problem. So need to get some anchovies!

-beta

Scaffolding - an open letter to mama

Dear Mama,

  I have had a little bit of a hard time over the last few days. As you know, I am remodeling in here, and that requires a lot of scaffolding. I am raising the roof, moving walls out and just generally making the place mine. It has come to my attention, however, that the position that you know as "bent over" just doesn't fit with my plans. Every time you bend over, you are squishing my scaffolding and it almost breaks entirely. I am sorry if I have caused any discomfort, but the only way to let you know is the nausea cord labeled by my brother. Please, if you could, could you not move for the next 9 months?

Thank you, 

Beta

P. S. - we're almost out of milk

Milk Crisis

We. Don't. Have. Any. Milk! 

Ok people, this is serious. I had to have mama call daddy home a little early from work to just make a run to Costco for some milk. The crisis is averted for now, but realize, there is a two day countdown to the next crisis.

On a side note, I am opening a new charity, it's called M-eta, Milk for Beta. I will take any cash donation, milk, or as it so happens I really like fresh squeezed lemonade. Remember, it takes a village to raise a child, or an entire fan following to grow a fetus.

-beta

Shopping!

Momma and I went on an excursion today. We left the house with my brother and went to a store in the wall, at least that's what a woman said: Wall-Mart. Anyways, I have started renovating the house. I wanted to push some of the walls out and do some remodeling. Turns out, that makes Momma, a little uncomfortable. The contractor let me know there are some good bones to the house, and that my brother had done some remodeling done as well. We could so add onto what he had done, so, that's what we are going to do.

So because of the remodeling, I decided that we needed to go shopping. I had heard about this but doing it is SSOOOOO much more fun! Did you know you get a whole lot of clothes and get to try them on? I am thinking maybe I will try on one of those purple moo-moos I saw on a woman being interviewed on the TV. She said something about a train and a lot of wind, I think that would be really fun! Anyways, really tired, so gonna hit the hay, until later for my hourly milk run.

-beta

Up!

So I was tidying up after lunch, when I found some fabric sticking out from a closet. I don't remember having cleaned that closet, so I went to investigate. I found this awesome machine that had a light fabric hung over the top of a basket, and a movie a long side of it named "Up!". So I watched the movie. It was sad at the beginning, but the dogs made me laugh. Once I saw the house take off from the ground, I knew what I had found: my brother's hot air balloon. Time for a spin.

I took great care to lay the material out. I made sure everything was out of the way. I found this canister of gas on the ground next to the balloon. As I turned it on, the balloon expanded. But you know what? No flame. It never lit, but the balloon expanded and started to rise a little. It then sink back down. There was a hole. For the rest of the day I kept fixing holes only to find another. Eventually, I got up, but I didn't mind the holes. After a while I eventually started to sound like the dog in Up. High pitched squeaking. It made me laugh so much.

Last night, however, as I was in the air, I overheard mama talking about needing to find some clothes she had. I don't know why, but she could borrow some of mine if she wants. I'll just see if I can get my balloon up and out, so I can deliver them to her. It might take a while. I'll just keep trying over and over until I get out!

-beta

The Derm-atologist

Yesterday was a fun trip down the nasal slide. I took A ton of pictures but after downloading them to my server, I couldn't find them. It turns out when the Internet says "server" it doesn't mean how you get food. The umbilical cord doesn't work for digital download. Hopefully I can get my computer here quickly, surfing on my phone just isn't viable without thumbs or A voice for Siri. It was a fun trip, I came out on this beautiful vista. It was dark, it was very bright, and there was this HUGE person. I think it was daddy. I tried taking a picture of him, but mamma moved and all I got was a picture of the roof of the nose. But Oh what fun as I slid down again back home! I will definitely do that again!

I need to setup an appointment with my dermatologist because I am developing three derms, I affectionately call them my ectoderm, mesoderm, and endoderm. The ectoderm is the smart one! It keeps growing and I can feel it starting to control me. The mesoderm is just kind of there, not doing much at he moment. I really connect with the endoderm, literally! That's where I tried downloading via the umbilical cord!

So as I said, I need to make an appointment, I want to make sure my derms are functioning right. I will have mamma call on Monday! Today, I am just going to keep drinking my milk! Did you know that I placed an order for a gallon in just one day? I am so glad mommy and daddy have a Costco membership, so gonna be using that for milk. Which reminds me, I need to go place an order for Tuesday!

- Beta

Says-a-me!

So I have finally finished moving in. Cleaned everything up, the which took a lot of de-stinkifying, but I am now moved in. I am NOW the size of a sesame seed! I'm filling out quite quickly now that mama is getting me the milk I wanted. I am so grateful my brother labeled things in here. He wrote everywhere! "Bater was here!" But he also wrote labels saying "for food, pull here" or "trampoline" and other things. I don't know what a trampoline is, but I definitely look forward to using it in the future!

I have to tell you, I opened the fridge this morning and low and behold, rotten eggs! It was the most foul and disgusting stench I had ever smelled! Ok, let's be honest, I can't entirely smell, and it was probably the first one I have come across, but sitill, I couldn't have it around! So naturally, threw the eggs out and opened a window. I heard daddy holding his breath while mamma just kept complaining of the stench! Glad that is done.

Well, gotta go, I am going to take a hike down a path labeled "nasal slide" don't know what I will find, but will take pictures!

- beta

Settling down

All day yesterday I had the opportunity to look around and explore my new home. Did you know, when you are the size of a poppyseed you can go just about anywhere?

I found a mess and it took me all day to clean it up. I didn't even know that mama's tummy could get this dirty. However, I am grateful my brother left me some of the take out menus. But you know what: I Want MILK!!! I wonder if I could go swimming in it? Do you think I could fill the pool with it? Definitely going to check it out. Now if only they could deliver milk? So need to go to Costco!

- Beta

Disgusting!

Well, can you believe it?! Here I am just moving in, when as I open the door I find...it is a mess in here. I need to teach my brother a lesson in being clean! Well I need to cleanup because, yes you guessed it, I'm coming!

As my brother said before me:
#!/bin/ruby

puts 'Hello World!'

Outputs:
Hello World!