Party time!

So it has been a hard week for mama and I. I have been studying like crazy to get ready for next week.  Today is my test for becoming a fetus. Wish me luck! I am sorry that I have been so heads down, and stealing so much energy from mama, just because I need to stay up longer than normal. All week long I have been getting to bed around 2 in the morning, so last night, I decided I wanted to throw a party! I invited all sorts of friends. I had a couple of RNA/TRNA friends over. They didn't get along very well with the MRNA because, well let's be honest, we always tend to beat the messenger up. Anyways the party was fun, but we stayed up until 3. Oops! Sorry mommy. I will start to do better.

Anyways, the party was fun and now I am going to sleep. I hope I get a good grade. I will let you all know what happens tomorrow.

-beta

The basics of a heartbeat

I have been thinking off and on over the past few days, about the basics of heartbeats! You know, I hear mama's heartbeat, and then I hear my own. Mine is very different. Kind of weird. Hers is SO powerful. Daddy says it is because she likes to run. I hear her heartbeat and it makes me very sleepy. At times, I will even drift .... Wait, what was I saying? Oh yeah. So I hear hers, and then I compare it to mine. Mine is a lot faster and it also sounds different. I only have 2 chambers in my heart, and mama has 4. 

Recently, however, as I have been listening, my heartbeat is changing. Instead of a tinny sound, kind of shallow, it is becoming more robust like mama's. It is a really weird feeling. Once it beats half way it kind of flaps for a brief millisecond. I wondered why I felt it doing that a couple of days ago. Then, as I was researching it, I found the answer in a song: "the Answer my friend, is blowing in the wind. The answer is blowing in the wind". It made total sense. When I breathe in, wind makes the flap move. I hope it closes soon!

-beta

The double gambit of gas

So I have decided that I really don't like soft drinks or soda as some might call it. Did you know that whenever mama drinks soda, it tickles my nose? Yeah, there I was minding my own business, when all of a sudden, a funny sensation took over on the front of my face. This tingling sensation that makes new want to just rip my nose off my face. But here is the real torture: my arms aren't long enough to scratch my nose! Oh the horror and the nastiness that is Coca-Cola! In order to combat the sensation, I do the only thing that I can: I pull the nausea cord! But you know what happens then? Yeah, mama drinks for soda to combat the nausea. It is a wicked web we interweave!

Yesterday was a good day. Mama and I got to visit some kids and they had all sorts of fun toys. I recently found a camera still attached to mama's belly button. It was labeled UMBCam. I attached to it, and now I can see everything clearly. Did you know Daddy walks funny? Yeah, he walks like a mitochondria with an enlarged cristae. Yeah, he's funny looking.

-beta

Happy week day!

I am 9 weeks old and this size of grape! I am sitting here, while writing this, checking all my organs. Brain, heart, lungs, intestines, colon, appendix, liver, kidneys, arms, legs, feet toes, hands and fingers. I am all here! Eyes are here too. But you know what? I still can't open them! They are fused shut. I consulted my manual: Babies, every thing from 0 - 21 years,  and it says that is normal. Did you know I come with a manual? Yeah. All babies do, but I was looking around and found my brothers. He left it behind. I wonder if that is normal?

So yesterday, I went on a safari! It was so much fun. I went all over mama's body, and I got some real trophies. I have a white and red blood cell on my wall now. I found some mitochondria, they were real stinkers, they fought the hards. The best trophy though, is hands down the ribosome I caught! I left it alive because I can have it produce any protein I want whenever I want!  Woohoo! An endless supply of  food. This should be good. Anyways, time to cleanup and get ready for church! I like nursery, if only I could see the toys.

-beta

Not Torn Docks, Doc-tor

Wow! So now it is official, the entire family knows. Mama and Daddy took me to the Torn Docks, but it turns out, that I just mis-understood, I went to the doctor. 

So there, I was with all my scrap booking materials spread out all over the floor, and I haven't vacuum since I moved in (mainly because Amazon said they didn't have a miniaturiser for shrinking things to fit inside humans, grrr I thought customer support was supposed to help) and boy did they surprise me. There I was trying to paste a picture of my sister's head on a page when bam! This massive thing bumped me right on the noggin. At first I thought it was nothing, but it wasn't. It kept moving around. I ran from it, but finally it pinned me in the corner. I made all sorts of silly faces at it, but all of a sudden a beam shot out and scanned me from head to toe. There was even a smaller beam that put a criss cross on my head and extended to my toes. I think they were measuring me.

Finally, they left me alone. Once I saw they were done, I immediately got things cleaned up. That was so embarassing.

Well, then, last night, mama and daddy told my siblings about me. It took them a while to figure out what mama was telling them, but finally, they got the hint and all is well. The world knows! Now I need to figure out how to send them direct messages. The Internet in here is spotty at best, I try to get mama to turn over more often when I am on it, but she does the opposite. Oh well! I think I am going to go on a safari today. I will tell you about it tomorrow.

-beta

Chasm Floating and Torn Docks!

Have you ever just floated in the chasm, and just listened to the marvelous heart beat of your mother? I have. It's one of my most favorite things to do. The sweet 100 decibel beat of the "mama heart" is so soothing! Whenever I here it speeding up, it helps me sleep. Floating. Just floating and feeling completely free is such a marvelous feeling!

This morning I woke up a little nervous. Mama and daddy are going to take me to a Torn Dock or something tomorrow. They say they want to hear my heartbeat. I looked it up on line, and I just don't understand how they are going to use a Torn Dock to hear my heartbeat. The only way I can think to do it, is make me scared some how to make my heartbeat loud enough to be heard on the outside. I have determined that nothing good comes from a dock! Anyways, that is why I am just floating here all day, so I can relax.

What will tomorrow bring?

- beta

Mashed potatoes!

So I know I go on and on about food all the time, but seriously, I really like mashed potatoes! They are like pre-chewed french fries, but without all the grease. I am thinking this will definitely be a craving I can keep for a long time.

So recently I have noticed that I am taking quite the toll on mama, and she is just so tired. I know she hasn't been able to get out as much as she used to, so I am making a deal. Mama, if you are reading this, I will let you have 15-20 minutes a day to get out and exercise a little. Once you do that, though, you have to promise me you will get me some mashed potatoes. No seriously. Good ones with plenty of milk and butter. I like butter too.

-beta

Happy Week Day!

I did it! I am the size of a kidney bean! And, I also finally fit into my jeans. The tail is almost gone. Do you know how many ab crunches you have to do to get rid of a tail? Yeah, a lot. I am constantly moving and trying to get rid of this tail. I also am starting to feel something in my throat growing towards the middle of my chest. For the past little bit, I have felt two distinct things growing in my chest, I looked it up on the wifi and they are my lungs. 

So yesterday, I had a run in with my brother. Here I was just minding my own business when, wham! He smacked mama's belly and I got the worst of it. He is so gonna get thrown up on when I get out of here. The rivalry begins! What will the Beta do? Only the Mama knows! Da-da-dum!

-beta

First there were 2, now there are 10

I am so excited! So when I first noticed my fingers, there were only 2. One on each hand.  I woke up this morning and realized there 10! Five on each hand! We humans are so weird. Do you think if I wait long enough, there will be 10 more. I mean like, that would be so....wait....I just saw something while writing this, ten more fingers! They on my feet! I have 20, ok, not really, they are toes, but still I can definitely come up with adventures for those too!  Time to get sucking!

-beta

Looking Forward

So yesterday, I wanted to wake up and look forward. I wanted to think of who I wanted to become. I wanted to will myself to grow. I figured, I could do with a little pick me up, so I hired a motivational speaker to come and talk to me. They were great! After they left, I started looking around me. I have really let this place become a mess, so I cleaned up the house. I started to excercise a little more. Also' after listening to the speaker, I realized I needed a change in my routine. I changed everything! I even told mama that I didn't want the normal food! Nothing sounded good to me, so I just kept telling her not to eat what she was eating.

The crazy part of my motivation came when the speaker introduced me to a mirror! I really started to look at myself and realized that I was quite transparent! People could see right through me, so I decided to try some clothes on. Not so well. Did you know that when you still have a tail bone protruding out, that your pants don't fit? Oh well, what grew down, must grow up! As my  motivational speaker says: if you can't touch your toes, grow some!

-beta

Time warp!

Once upon a time, there was a little embryo growing inside of a mama. Now this embryo loved to drink milk, drink v8 splash, and suck as much energy as possible from mama. One day, this embryo went to sleep and didn't wake up until 2 days later. Why? Do you ask? Because they fell into a TIME WARP! It was soooo cool. I just got back from an excursion that was so unique and marvelous, I just had to tell you about it. I am still shaking from the excitement. I was sleeping away, when all of a sudden, a huge hole opened up. It sucked me inside. There I was falling for a really long time, swirling and swinging around and watching my siblings swirl around me. Did you know how much fun it is to put your arms in the air as you fall down! It is so cool! The amnio fluid swirling around you. The colon passing you by as you looking into the deep red pockets of the small intestine! Oh the sweet whisperings of mama's heart! It was so cool.

As I fell, I got closer and closer to something blue and brighter than anything I had ever seen. Turns out, it was mama's sock! I got closer to it, then slowed down and started to go in reverse. Slowing when, after a while, I finally got back home. I woke up and, now after relating this story to you, I start to realize what happened: I fell out of bed while sleeping and got stuck in my brother's bungee cord! I definitely need to talk to him when I get out of here.

-beta

V8 Splash! Branching out

So today, I thought I would give mama a break and let her get some energy back. I also decided that I wouldn't drink so much milk and branch out trying some different drinks. V8 splash was first up. The jury is still out on that, don't quite know what to make of it. Right now, I am swimming in orange pineapple juice and singing if I only had some toes!  

-beta

Happy Week Day!

I a a blueberry! Ok, technically I am not a blueberry, but I am just as big as one and just as sweet! (I will wait for you women to finish cooing over that last statement). I have been growing like crazy this last week. Did you know that I have partial eyelids, a nose, skin, 2 hemispheres of my brain, a liver, a pancreas, an appendix and a loop in my intestine? Yeah, and you wonder why mama has been tired. I had a nice calm day yesterday, I wanted to take some time and reflect on where I have been over the last little bit. I am so happy that I get meet so many people and just have some fun. I have quite a bit planned for next week, I hope I get around to it.

-beta

French Fries and mixed signals

So last night, I hit the emergency "I need food" button and placed an order for some ice cream. Just as soon as I placed the order, I realized I had pressed the wrong button and something called "French fries" was ordered. I wasn't quite sure what to expect, but once mama started eating I was very happy! Did you know about these fries? They are awesome! I wanted more and more.

Later during the night, I kept asking for more and more of them, but mama didn't feel too well after that. Something about her gall bladder. So, she was sick through the night and I was cranky during the night. Now that it is morning and I have had something good to eat, I realize, it was only the French fries talking and not me. I need to make sure I use that button sparingly. They were good though.

-beta

Siblings and the paper birds!

Over the past couple of days, I have decided I wanted to watch my siblings playing and try to figure out what games they are playing, so that I can be studied up to play with them when I get out of here. As I have been watching, my sister made these intricate birds out of paper! They are really cool. The birds flap their wings when you move them up and down. When my siblings play with the birds, they run around the house squawking and making all sorts of noise. It looks like so much fun.

I had to try it. So I decided to run around and move my arms up and down flapping them like crazy, because you know I can do that now. Anyways, as I did that, I think I may have effected mama, I slammed into the sickness button multiple times. Sorry mama! Anyways, I will continue to watch my siblings and see if they have any more fun games to play. My brother however, has a crazy game of twitching, convulsions and sounds that I haven't quite figured out yet. He swings one arm around and says "Ha! Take that!" Maybe it won't make sense until after I try it out?

-beta

Sleep master beta "B"

That's right, just call me sleep master beta "B"! Ever since I saw the potential in my arms, I figured I needed to step up my training! I called my brother's trainer to see if he would be willing to train me, but he was called away to fight some battle with an Aasgardian or something, who kows what that is. Anyways, he told me about some people and I am happy to say, I have found my new trainer. He is a new person on the block, but boy does he know his stuff. My biceps are the size of a blastocyst. Very exciting. With all this training, I need a lot of energy, so I re-ran the electric that I had just done and found another power cell, previously untapped. It was marked "momma's backup energy". Good thing I can't read because this new energy is helping me grow like crazy. I hope to reach blueberry size by Sunday! 

I have noticed, however, that momma seems to not move as often as she did before I started training. I hope she is doing well. I made sure to tape down her sleep button, so that when I train, I don't accidentally kick it. Well, off to train!

-beta

They're alive!

So, yesterday I was just sitting around after a lively growing session, and while drinking some milk, i looked to my right and saw something moving. I kind of jumped from the start of seeing something moving and low and behold, there were my fingers moving! My hand as well! They're alive! So I naturally turned to my Left to see if the others were moving, and you know what, they were not. I was so frustrated. I sat there and just thought how frustrating it was.

After thinking about it for a while, I was really. angry, and so I turned and looked right at them. I couldn't say much to my fingers and hand, as my mouth is not entirely open, but I could think it. I thought up quite the toungue lashing for my fingers. I pictured my right arm moving and said, see, that arm and fingers know what to do, why not you? Do you want me to show you? All of a sudden, the fingers responded and said: don't let your left hand know what your right hand doeth. And with that, I think it was enough to make them angry enought that they moved! My fingers and arm moved! I can move both arms and fingers and hands. Now was it an accident or was it on purpose? Nope, for the next several hours they kept hitting me in the chin, as they are not quite long enough to hit me in the face.

My arms are now asleep, thank goodness, and I can go on growing. Oh the fun that we are going to have, me and my arms.

-beta

Open letter to Daddy

Dear Daddy,

  Over the last two days, you haven't been around that much. You haven't helped me with my correspondence and have such, failed in your duty! I will demand milk in several installments to make it up to me, or just come and give me a shout out when you have a chance! I like it when you tickle mommy, it makes her belly jiggle and then I jiggle as well. I get to have a fun ride for a few seconds. I give you permission to tickle her as often as you like, but beware, I found a warning here from my brother talking about the last time you tickled her, she got angry. So maybe if you tickle her when she is  least expecting it? Just remind her, this all part of your apologizing to me for not helping me as you should have.

-beta

The Sleeper

So I have to apologize to momma for the last few days and also for what will come over the next little bit. I was talking with my contractor, and I found out that, by accident, when pushing the walls out for the jacuzzi and dance hall, that the walls have been pushed up against the sleep cord, labeled so by my brother. It turns out that I can't fix it because the wall is a load baring wall. So, sorry momma! I didn't mean to make you sleepy all the time.

On a side note, we went to visit some family yesterday. I have determined that I don't like large groups. It makes momma not feel well, and in turn, there are so many people, I just couldn't remember all their names! There was Sleepy, Bashful, Doc...wait, see, I can only remember so many names, there isn't enough space in my brain yet...which is starting to develop quite nicely! Well gotta get momma up for my first morning breakfast, I have three normally.

-beta

Happy weekday!

It's official, I am now 6 weeks old! Woohoo! I am the size of a lentil. Now I have been experiencing some rather strange feelings over the past couple of days. First, when I look to either side of my torso, there are these things, bumps sticking out with little stems and bumps sticking out from them as well. I can't explain why, but I have the uncanny urge to suck on one of them. Next, I am starting to feel something grow inside my mouth, I am starting to get the urge to sing! Don't know why. Finally, while I was looking in the mirror, I found these impressions on the side of my perfectly shaped oval head! Why did this happen? This was my best feature? They are on either side of my head. Oh well, I guess this lentil is starting to turn into a split pea.

Well, I am happy to report that all is well, and now if I can only get mama to wake up and get me some milk. I am hungry! All of the time!

-beta